Turtling

(some religious content)

I’ve been hiding from the world a bit lately.  I can understand doing so in real life, but it is odd that the same thing would happen on-line.

It’s not that anything really bad is going on – for which I am grateful.  Perhaps it’s feeling a bit stuck in a rut.  DH got all the way to the end with another job, but they gave it to the other candidate.  DH (IMO) is an amazingly great guy and worker, and I think what must be happening is that he impresses them at interviews etc. so he progresses forward, even when the job isn’t exactly what he has done before.  All this time & energy goes into the process, and at the end they decide on someone who has more directly relevant experience.  It’s happened 3 times!  Then, he had an interview for a job he really wanted, but he just wasn’t on his game and “bombed the interview” (his words).  I don’t know whether to file that in “bad things happen to good people” “$&it happens” or “God has other plans.”  The cycle of hope, anticipation, and then crashing is not fun.  (sounds a bit like a TTC cycle doesn’t it?  I asked DH what was harder for him, and he said probably the job search cycle, since it is something one *ought* to have more control over). 

Anyway we are hanging in.  I go through spurts of having the house tidy-ish, laundry pretty much caught up, good food (lots of veggies) and me eating well (not too many carbs, only 1 cup of coffee, etc).  Then we go through times when it all falls apart and we are ordering pizza and frantically trying to match socks.  Ugh.  I much prefer the more organized living but sometimes it is hard to climb back up there – at least for me.  It makes me wonder if other people really go through this, or if I’m just lazy, caught up in inertia, not domestic, etc etc.

Yesterday was a pretty rainy, grey day until late afternoon.  I was sitting at the computer, looking out the window and thinking how I really should get outside while the sun is shining.  I thought about all the benefits of fresh air, a little walk, hearing the birds sing, etc.  But it wasn’t enough to move my butt from the chair.  At last I said a little prayer along the lines of “God, please help me to get outside.  I’m not strong enough to do this on my own.”  (I know, pretty sad that I can’t manage to get outside isn’t it?)

5 minutes later the doorbell rang – a friend of mine who was going for a walk happened to stop by just in case I was home, to invite me out for a walk.  It’s a bit unusual for one of us to just drop in on the other – usually we call first – so this was unexepected.  I got myself into fit-to-be-seen clothes and outside we went.  It then occured to me, you could say she’s the answer to a prayer 😉  Isn’t that funny?  It could be pure coincidence.  It could be energy vibes or a disturbance in the space-time continuum.  Or it could be that an angel gave her a nudge.  I don’t know. 

But it was good to get outside for a bit, and helped me to feel better.  See, I’m even blogging again 😉

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Catherine

I’ve been feeling overwhelmed with life a bit lately.  DH got right to the final stage with a job, but the other candidate was chosen in the end (background tallied more closely with the company).  Sooner or later it will have to be our turn!  There are some other opportunities on the go that are of great interest to DH, so we’ll see.  Meanwhile I feel like a compass spinning and spinning.  I hope we will settle soon and start to move on in a direction.  The stress is getting to me – not only is my blog writing far behind, but my eating habits are a disaster!  I can’t have saltine crackers in the house or I will eat an entire sleeve with butter & jam.  I’ve been drinking waaaay too much Tim Horton’s coffee.  My new strategy is to buy lots of veggies instead, though somehow I don’t crave them the same way.

Other news that has been taking up alot of my emotional space – if you have prayers, positive vibes, or love you can send out to a 5-year old girl named Catherine, it would be so appreciated.  Through my circle of friends I became acquainted with Catherine’s mom, and our paths have crossed quite a few times.  Catherine was diagnosed with cancer and will be undergoing 5 more rounds of chemo, etc. to fight the tumours.  Any details I know have come fourth hand, but I heard it was neuroblastoma – which is not a good one.  The prognosis is not sounding good.  Catherine is a fiesty, energetic little girl and the last person I’d have thought would get sick.  As you can imagine it is terribly hard for the whole family, including the little brother (maybe 2 years old?) who is currently living with a family member. 

Please think of them in this terrible time, and send them healing, supportive thoughts, prayers or whatever you may have to send.

Thank you!

Dead Sexy?

Don’t you love it when the thrill of hmm – lust, desire, interest? takes you by surprise? 

I enjoy folding laundry and watching TV – it’s almost the only time I do watch TV.  Sometimes I go for a Rachael Ray cooking show, or an episode of Nova (the Megavolcano episode was great!) Recently I’m hooked on “The Naked Archaeologist” – he explores stories from the Bible by delving into archaeological sites, interviews w/ archaeologists, historians or scientists that are expert in that age or area.  It’s all interspersed with movie and TV clips and told with a great sense of humour.

While I find him very interesting and knowledgeable and I admire the work he does, that little flare of “oooo!” didn’t really come up – until the episode I watched yesterday.  In it he ends up going back to the original Hebrew of the particular story we’re exploring, and he reads it.  WELL!  I always thought he had rather a nice voice/accent … but listening to him read the Hebrew was a delightful jolt, completely unexpected.

I’ll admit I have a thing for men and foreign languages.  (DH can speak at least 2 languages that I don’t understand 😉 )  And the things I find sexy about men aren’t usually the obvious things.  One of first the “thrills” that came my way for DH was when we were driving somewhere and I happened to look at his hands on the steering wheel.  For some reason that sent a flame through me.  This isn’t to say I can’t appreciate more obvious characteristics, but the subtle ones tend to thrill me more, perhaps because they are unexpected.

Now I will be watching this show with renewed interest, hoping that once again Simcha Jacobovici will read Hebrew 🙂

(incidentally, his work is not without controversy – I don’t mean that I agree with everything he says.  But I can still enjoy the voice he says it with!)

I’d love to know if others can relate to this, and to hear what takes them by surprise to give that shot of bliss …